THINK ABOUT THOSE
BOUNDARIES IN YOUR HEAD

Journal of Healing – July 5, 2006

By Mary Koch

  People just can’t seem to figure out boundaries.

            Yes, it’s me again. Sadie, the people dog. It’s so hot, I’m devoting my time to thinking instead of running around. The boss lady claims I’m being lazy. I’m not. I’m working very hard. Mentally.

            Like, I’ve been thinking about boundaries. For us dogs, boundaries are simple. Marking our individual property lines comes naturally to us, and we mostly respect each other’s boundaries. That doesn’t mean we can’t cross them. It means when some other dog is on my property, he recognizes I’m the boss. Usually.

*     *     *

            EVERY ONCE in a while some visitor will forget the protocol. Just last week during a family gathering, a young fellow – new to the family – shows up. He wants to play, of course. Those puppyish games used to be entertaining, but now I’m of a certain age. I prefer to spend my time in more cerebral activity.

            So he’s running around, oohing and aahing at every bush. It kind of amuses me, watching this naïve pup discover my world. Amuses me until he finds my bone. True, I’d lost interest in the bone days earlier, having given it a thorough gnawing. The flavor was pretty much sucked out.

            Still, my property rights are clear. I curl my lip to remind him, but he’s oblivious. Preemptive action is called for. Shock and awe.

He’s such a little guy, I flatten him with a mere growl and a shove. He’s yelping bloody murder, and the boss lady hauls me off him before I have time to use full force.

Does he get the message! The whole rest of the visit he lets out a pitiful whine every time I get within 10 feet. That’s his way, I guess, of letting me know his boundary.

            Human boundaries are more complicated. It seems to me, a lot of their boundaries are in their heads. They set boundaries for themselves or let other people set boundaries for them, and a whole lot of those boundaries just don’t need to be there.

*     *     *

            THE BOSS lady, for example, tries to impose all kinds of boundaries on me. But then there’s The Boss. He can’t walk or talk like most other people, but he doesn’t let those boundaries stop him from enjoying life. So I follow his lead. Why submit to artificial boundaries?

            I’ve tried to explain that to the boss lady, but she doesn’t speak my language. So I use a different tactic. I just kinda wear her down.

She builds a fence; I find a way around it. She calls; I come – eventually, when I’m ready. No matter how long it takes me to come, she’ll give me a doggie biscuit. She’s convinced if she rewards me for “good” behavior, even when it’s delayed, I’ll be good. And I will be. When I want.

            The boss lady’s weird boundaries get her into more trouble than they keep me out of. Like the day we walk to the post office and she ties me up outside. The sign on the post office door says “no dogs.” Talk about silly boundaries.

            While she’s inside getting the mail, the automatic sprinklers turn on. When she comes out, she finds she’s on one side of a wall of water, and I’m on the other. Won’t do her any good to call “Come, Sadie.” She’s the one who tied me up. I give her a look that says, “So now what’s your plan?”

            She whines, sounding something like that little dog, and then she gets wet. Maybe one of these days, she’ll get boundaries figured out.

© Mary Koch, Omak, Washington 2006

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