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THE TRICK
IS TO TREAT Journal of Healing – Oct. 25, 2006 By Mary Koch It was the opening of Halloween season in our house. After I got off the phone, I found another spider artfully hidden under some papers on the kitchen counter and a third “crawling” up a living room lampshade. I confronted my husband. “Are there spiders hidden all over the house?” I asked. John burst into laughter. He and his daytime aide, Marlenea, were in cahoots. Soon she would be festooning our front porch with witches and skeletons, synthetic spider webs and orange lights. As a would-be eco-friendly, “green” consumer I’m conflicted over Halloween, just like a recovering alcoholic of Irish descent might feel on St. Patrick’s Day. I’m overwhelmed by the extravagance of this event that demands a shopping season of its own. The National Retail Federation joyfully predicts consumers will spend $4.96 billion this Halloween, up from just $3.29 billion a year ago. That’s an average expenditure of $59.06 per person for orange-and-black, plastic stuff. * * * THE ONE thing that makes ecological sense to me is using artificial jack o’lanterns instead of allowing a nutritionally-valuable food source turn to “slime” (as a farmer friend observed) on people’s front porches. Wouldn’t you know, last year our lighted plastic pumpkins were the one Halloween decoration that mysteriously disappeared. Prime suspects were a gang of trick-or-treaters who were too old and too late when they noisily made their way onto our front porch around 10 p.m. They obligingly left when I declined to open the door. A little too obligingly. A small price to pay for the best evening’s entertainment we get at home all year, provided by neighborhood trick-or-treaters. Yes, I spot cars inching their way up the street, driven by parents who bring their kids in from other areas. That’s OK; we’re all community. For me the tricky part is the “treat.” Two-thirds of us American adults are overweight – one-third obese – and diabetes has reached epidemic proportions. Now it appears children are well on their way to surpassing the adult obesity rate. My thoughts are admittedly morbid. Traditionally, Halloween – or “hallowed evening” – was the night before All Saints Day, when medieval Christians contemplated the inevitability of death. In fast-food America, it is ironic that we stuff our children on this formerly sacred evening with the kind of high-calorie, high-fat treats that will likely contribute to our demise. * * * EVERY YEAR I’ve tried to come up with healthful alternatives. I finally gave up on little boxes of raisins after recovering too many unopened boxes the next morning in our shrubbery, where they’d been tossed with disdain. We’ve offered a variety of non-edible treats including a lucky find one year of affordable gem stones. Another year, at a loss for anything more creative, we handed out shiny quarters. Even with that largesse, we didn’t reach the $59.06 total. This year I’m giving up. As I watched John and Marlenea strategize Halloween decorations, I announced that they will also be in charge of treat procurement. They’re going shopping this afternoon. The child in me is kind of hoping they’ll bring home candy with lots of chocolate, nuts and marshmallow – and that there’ll be enough left-over for some unholy snacking on All Saints Day. © Mary Koch, Omak, Washington 2006 |
